The World’s Largest Rectal Sphincter

Today, on Father’s day no less, I encountered the world’s largest rectal sphincter, (no, not my dad). This sphincter committed the ultimate sin. He custom ordered at the drive up on a Sunday. I’m not talking about iced tea, unsweetened, no lemon, or coffee with cream and two sugars. I’m talking about 26 minutes placing an order at a Wendy’s drive up. No, he didn’t have to wait on them to take his order. This was the Fried Chicken Special ordered backed to the nines!

The Red Neck in his jacked up 4MPG bundle o’ joy trapped in line behind him barked the tires as he revved his motor and pulled out of line once the rectal sphincter had _finally_ pulled forward. When the mini-van in front of me crept hesitantly forward I peeled hard right out the other exit.

Wendy’s lost two customers that day because of that rectal sphincter. Hopefully they gave him a tongue lashing when he got up to the window. A much bigger hope is that we one day develop a genetic test to weed these individuals from the gene pool.